Ravings of a Mad Man: vol. 4.19
It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid then open it and remove all doubt
-Mark Twain
Let me recite some lyrics to a popular song that is sung by probably every American kid at on point in their. The last time I sang it was in the shower on Sunday. "Yankee Doodle went to town a-riding on a pony stuck a feather in his cap and called it macaroni…etc." That is all I need to make the story relevant. As Jenny and I prepare ourselves for parenthood we are boning up on our funny songs to sing to kids in the car until they get annoyed. So anyway we were singing that song on Sunday. Then I said to Jenny, "What kind of a man was Yankee Doodle that he had the authority to pick up a feather and by sticking it in his cap could call it macaroni?" Many times when Jenny responds to my questions I am amazed at how she came up with that answer. She says to me she says, "Yankee Doodle was a lot like Jay-Z of his day. People liked his songs and his rhymes were good and so he was able to call things different things by sticking them in his hat." I thought that was so true. Jay-Z = Yankee Doodle oh now I get it. History truly does repeat itself. I also have been wondering what else Yankee Doodle put in his hat so he could call it something else. There were not so popular songs written about those as well but little kids don't sing them anymore. Kids what do they know? The other songs include, Yankee Doodle stuck a lizard putting it in his hat and calling ravioli. Also Yankee Doodle wrote a song entitled, "I Got 99 Problems but a Brit Aint One." However, Ben Franklin and other membors of the historic think tank didn't allow the release of such crude use of the English language. So just to recap in the past there was Dan Webster (whom I despise) that defined words and now makes people use his definitions for everything, and Yankee Doodle who dared to question the norm and renamed things at his and his hat's pleasure.
Trivia Time: It turns out that if I use the word puke to describe her cooking Jenny will slap me after saying it once. This week's question is what day will the baby come? Hopefully soon!
Beat the Odds Tip: Sometimes it is good to let sleeping dogs lie and other times it is important to bother that dog.
I gave the Beat the Odds Tip as it is because this past week when Jenny and I went to the doctor I began guessing as to how dilated Jenny would be. I guessed to a three Jenny was didn't think so. So then I asked Jenny if I could ask the doctor if it were possible for me to check and see how dilated she is. Jenny said that I couldn't ask him but that she would ask for me. So when the doctor came in she asked. With his half smirk he told me that nobody has every asked to know how to do that. Anyway he told me that he took him several months of checking 20 women a day to be able to really tell. I was a little disappointed in that. I guess I will never know how to do that. Oh well some things, I guess are better left up to the professionals.
Have a good week I know I will now keep your fingers crossed.
Eric Jones
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