Ravings of a Mad Man: vol. 5.1 (lasers are better with friends)

Ravings of a Mad Man: vol. 5.1

It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid then open it and remove all doubt

-Mark Twain

What wisdom can be given to you all in this the week of Christmas? I don't really have any sound wisdom so I thought it would be good to give you sound wisdom from the mouths of babes. I know that some of you are excited to hear this because you think that it might wisdom from good looking girls or maybe even wisdom from a pig named babe. But alas it is wisdom from a 4 year old and a 9 year old. This past weekend Jenny and I had a pajama party with two of Gigi's cousins Whit (9) and Taylor (4 almost 5) and I don't know if it is because kids are smarter these days or maybe it is just these kids but they gave Jenny and I some sound pointers on life. While waiting in the car Taylor said to me he says, "Do you know when Gigi is 5 you will only have one kid?" I didn't understand how he knew this so I asked, "What do you mean?" He then said the following, "You and Jenny don't have any other kids because you haven't asked Jesus to put a baby in her tummy." To which I responded with sound logic, "Well Jenny and I have a plan, so we are going to ask Jesus for more kids in a timely manner." He just repeated, "Yep, Jesus will put more babies her tummy." Then after arriving home from Christmas light viewing we were discussing breakfast and I said, "Don't the kids want to eat chicken nuggets for breakfast?" Whit was first to chime in, "You don't eat chicken nuggets for breakfast, that is gross." I said, "Well you eat chicken nuggets for lunch and that is only like two hours after breakfast." Then came the wisdom. She says to me she says, "You are supposed to eat something fresh for breakfast. Like cereal." I never knew cereal was fresh. So we had pancakes the next morning with syrup made with real sugar.

Trivia Time: The best tradition is the when the Elves visit for the 12 days of Christmas. This week's question is why is Christmas on the 25th of December?

Beat the Odds Tip: If laser really could damage then you don't ever want to get trapped by Danny when he has a laser gun in his hands.

Lasers everywhere, it was a wild night as we shot lasers at each other for two hours. It was an intense battle and I am glad to say that if something went down, with aliens and stuff I am pretty that that group of people that were there would be able to protect the Salt Lake Valley. You know because aliens use lasers and we would steal their lasers then use their lasers against them. Aliens are so stupid. Have they ever beat humans? It is like they have this awesome technology where they can travel at light speed but they lack one technology that can't be created in a nerd's lab. That is human's ability to make more human's. Aliens can only make more aliens. Any way I digress. I just wanted to give out awards some outstanding achievements in the field of excellence of laser tag.

  • Most Impressive Moves: Corey Bruse (rolling on the ground) & Tim Jones (pretending to be the marshal)
  • Most Creative Shooting: Dan Scott (his technique could not be imitated and was very effective)
  • Most Vocal: Russ Loncyzna (I have only heard one other human scream as much as he did, and they were being attacked by real aliens. Or maybe I am just thinking of time I saw a pig get slaughtered?)
  • Cutest Killer: Jenny Jones (We teamed up the first game and she kept killing me because she thought I was somebody else, but how can you get mad at that smile?)
  • Eagle Eye Shooting: Leif (When you heard tippy-toes that means you were screwed because he was looking over the tops of the barriers shooting his lasers)
  • Most Shots Fired: Mickael Sorensen (I think in one game he shot over 1800 lasers I think the average was like 800 or so)
  • Best Team Work Non-Team Play: Mario Costanzo and Gang (If you ran where they were standing you weren't making it our alive)
  • Best Team Play: Red Team; Danny So, Mickael, Lathe, Jenny, Emi, Ally, Eric, Carter, Alex, Russ L (You betta believe it was the red team)
  • Most Improved Player: Eric Jones (I went from 24th to finish 9th in the last game)
  • Most Enjoyable to kill or be killed by: Russ Rasmussen (You just couldn't help but smile when he killed you and he always got killed with a smile on his face)
  • Most Crucial Players for the Evening to Work: Kent Jones and Brady Jones (Used fair play and their kind hearts to allow other players to play while they sat on the bench)
  • Sneakiest Kills: Danny Harris, Amanda Harris and Phil Brown (I don't know how they did it but they worked like mice as they came around corners and got you when you weren't looking)
  • Most Likely to Succeed in a Real Laser Fight: Jdub (his ability to shot his laser without looking and hit a target was ridiculous)
  • Best Wounds: Carter Chase (After getting a blister on his trigger finger he switched to his ring finger only to get a blister on that finger)
  • Most Valuable Player: Danny Sorensen (He won two of the three games and never quit)

I just wanted to thank everyone that was there it worked out to be a great evening. I should have brought a pen and some paper so I could have given awards to everybody. If you were not listed above then that means you get the participation award. The pictures are attached but aren't that great of quality.

Have a good week I know I will

Eric Jones


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