Ravings of a Mad Man: vol. 6.01
It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid then open it and remove all doubt
What could be more appropriate than a newsletter on the day of love? Here are a few things I think are more appropriate:
Dogs on leashes, Sportscenter, Candy in the shape of hearts, hugs and kisses, romantic poems, candle light dinners (unless your power is out or the person that reads the blog in Moscow if you don't have power, I understand that if a person in Moscow reads the blog then they must have power or a library card. Do they have a library system like ours in Moscow?…[20 minutes of Google] turns out they don't have a library system like ours [United States] but they do have cyber cafés. Okay to be honest I didn't spend 20 minutes on Google I just assumed Moscow is like Ecuador and they have Cyber cafés. Okay back to the list of things that are appropriate on Valentine's Day.) Troll Valentine's Cards, Those Valentine Boxes that elementary school kids make (those things were pretty cool really I mostly liked to make the box and didn't particularly care about the Valentines unless there was candy in them then they were more awesome than the most awesome box). I just had a thought; there are certain things I am really going to love about Gigi getting older and one of those things is the Valentine's boxes. Then I thought I will probably also enjoy helping her with all of her homework, because it will be easy and I will be able to do it way better than any of those kids. Finally I will be top of the class (evil laughter). I guess Valentine's Day (aka My Birthday's Eve also a celebrated holiday in several of the World's smaller countries) is a pretty cool one and even though you have to spend money on the day before my birthday. I just don't think I completely thought it through when I decided to vacate the womb some 28 years ago. I remember thinking to myself (inside the womb mind you) that things were getting kind of cramped and if this is the kind of food I am getting in here just image what the food would be like on the outside. You might laugh but I remember that very distinctly either that or I am confusing the womb with the bathtub I used as a little kid. That raises a lot of other questions like what was eating in the bathtub that inspired me to get out? Hopefully it was just a Baby Ruth. I guess the point I am trying to make is if you don't like this holiday then stop calling it Valentine's Day and call it Ericmas Eve (Please note if I get sick after sending this newsletter then you know never to call the day before your birthday YourNamemas Eve). Well I just want to finish by saying that this has already been the best Valentine's Day ever. When I got out of the shower little stinker was there and she said, "Morning!" Then she did a happy feet dance followed by a big hug and a kiss. When we asked her to say, "Happy Valentine's Day" she said, "Happy Valentnadnaday!" Followed by, "I want chocolate milk, you want chocolate milk, Okay." Yes our daughter has learned that through cuteness she can pretty much get anything she wants and what is cuter than a one-year old that has a conversation with herself about getting chocolate milk? So from my daughter to all of you guys "Happy Valentnadnaday!" probably the best holiday on the 14th of February (it narrowly beats out Ericmas Eve).
Trivia Time: Will the Jazz make the playoffs?
Have a good week I know I will
This message was approved by Eric Jones