Ravings of a Mad Man: vol. 6.22
It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid then open it and remove all doubt
-Mark Twain
How many times would you try and park your car before you decided, "Hey maybe I am not meant to park here?" I will be the first to admit that I am not the best at parking but I do know when it is time to quit trying to fit a square peg into a round hole. Pertinent background information, I remember in High School I went to the West Jordan vs Bingham basketball game and I couldn't find a spot anywhere until, "Yes there it was the perfect spot." I quickly pulled right in with no issues. At least I thought there weren't any issues. At the time of the incident I was only 15 but my sister had already went to the game and my friend wanted to go so we took her car. Apart from what I am about to say the night went off without a hitch oh and the stop I "rolled" through. When I came out to leave I was greeted with yelling from an adult, my arch enemy at the time (Please note it was not this particular adult just adults in general). This human started calling me names and telling me I am huge idiot to whom I responded gracefully by one not peeing my pants and by not saying anything to him. Apparently my parking spot was too good to be true because I double parked and blocked him in. Still to this day I wish I had investigated my parking performance a little better because I think he double parked after me, yeah that's it he somehow got his car wedged in there behind mine. Okay now for the real story. A couple of weeks ago Jenny and I went to get a snow cone at Cup O' Snow, I highly recommend doing this before the snow cone season ends. Anyway as we waited for our glorious concoctions to emerge from the magical shake we saw a large SUV pull into the parking lot. I paid particular attention to it because they were going to park next to our car. As they tried to get in there my first thought was, "Oh heavens they are never going to make that." Sure enough they went in and had to back out making the slightest of corrections to their trajectory. Attempt number 2 didn't go any better than the first attempt. So in reverse they went only to find a car waiting to get by so rather than just properly correct their course they went back when from whence they came. As soon as the car went past they reversed this time they had made enough of a course correction to get into the parking spot. They kept rolling forward almost hitting a tree in the grass in front of their car. Jenny and I thought that they would be satisfied with that but apparently they couldn't get the doors open to get out. So into reverse the car went for attempt number 5. They parked successfully, and that is when the flashbacks started for me. I imagined they would come to the snow shack shouting profanities at the driver of the blue sedan just like the old man at the high school basketball game. They didn't I was glad because I would hate to be banned from getting a snow cone from the best snow shack in the valley. I could image that is what the owners of the snow shack would do to teach me a lesson in parking. As we left I verified that I had properly parked in my designated area. Wouldn't know it, I was right in there with plenty of room on either side of my car. They however were still on the line making it difficult to not only get myself into the car but Gigi likes a wide girth to climb into her seat. She told me it is because she doesn't like the door to pressure her into hurrying. She doesn't want to pull a hammy while climbing into her seat. Anyway the point is, had this young (gender removed for non-bias reasons) just gone a little bit further into the parking lot he/she would have found several parking spots equidistance from the one he/she so desperately desired. And they were a lot easier to park in with his/her SUV. Also they would have gotten their magical snow cone sooner. I guess it is true what they say, "Good things come to those who wait."
Trivia Time: I am starting a pool with real prizes, maybe. You guess what day you think BBJ will be born and how big of a baby BBJ will be and the winner will receive something cool from Brenda's basement.
Have a good week I know I will
Eric Jones
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