Ravings of a Mad Man: vol. 6.28
It is better to keep your mouth shut and appear stupid then open it and remove all doubt
-Mark Twain
What a spectacular weekend! What you might say? Eric don't you realize that the Utes were decimated, that Real scored on themselves to lose again and that BYU came from behind to beat the Aggies costing you a bag of chips? To which I responded, "This world is not all about sports however if the following events hadn't taken place then I would have been in a bad mood all weekend. Believe me." So here is how our weekend played out. So you all know that we are on baby watch 2011 so Friday night it was decided that I should stay home, instead of go to the Cottonwood football game so I stayed home and watched the USU vs BYU football game. In the end that game was a waste of time. I tell you what wasn't a waste of time was Fringe. If you are not watching Fringe and you enjoy science fiction crap then you will like Fringe. I am pretty sure that this is the last season of Fringe so catch up and watch it end live. The baseball playoffs will give you a few extra weeks to catch up. So of course the baby didn't come on Friday night. We went to bed only to wake up at 5:30 am but not to go to the hospital just to sit and stare at each other. So there we sat for 3 hours. Then Jenny said we better go to the hospital so off we went. It was the complete opposite experience from when Gigi was born. When she came it was all rush, rush, rush and junk but with this one we just kind of mosied into the hospital all smiles and high fives. I really like this version better because Jenny was able to answer all of the questions instead of me making answers up. Turns out Jenny isn't 5'5" and 180 lbs. Who knew? Apparently Jenny knows that. So we went back and Jenny wasn't in active labor so they said you have to stay an hour then you can leave. Instead of what they told us we decided to be admitted into a room where I promptly fell asleep on the couch and Jenny laid in bed for about 3 hours. Then the doctor came in and said, "Well you are numb and the contractions are getting stronger so if you want to you can push now." We went with the flow I took my position on the right leg, out of the way. The once cold room was draped with colorful sterile cloth adding depth and character as we prepared to greet our baby boy for the first time outside of the womb. Jenny pushed for about 5 or 10 minutes and out came the head. The doctor said, "Okay I am going to need one more big push to get the shoulders out." Silently Jenny gritted her teeth bore down and pushed with vigor. Clenching her teeth BBJ moved slightly and then before I could react liquid came gushing out from behind the baby and it hit me in the hand. So we already know that BBJ is a big practical jokester. I had to look away as I started to dry heave. I am not certain but I think that 9 out of 10 doctors agree that vomiting on a baby is not the best thing right after delivery. The 1 doctor that disagrees isn't really a doctor he is this homeless guy that they call Doc. So that study isn't scientific in any way, shape or form. After that little joke baby Grayson Royal Jones was officially a healthy human boy sustaining himself. Weighing in at 7 lbs 11.6 oz at a height of 21.5 inches he is ready to join in the baby class of MMA. Not really he can't start training for several weeks but when he does watch out Baby MMA world Grayson is going to dominate. So that is why this was the best weekend of 2011.
Trivia Time: Brian Billingsley guessed 10/1/11 he can now go and pick something out from Brenda's basement (valued at $5 or less is what Brenda told me) Who or what is the best otter pop flavor?
Have a good week I know I will
Eric Jones
This message was approved by Eric Jones
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